Max’s story: I had to push for help with my mental health

Max was diagnosed with Hodgkin Lymphoma after suffering with long covid and then having to go back and forth to the doctors, until a CT scan showed lumps in his chest. He went on to have 12 rounds of chemotherapy and had to have emergency surgery on his brain due to blood clots. 

Max wants to share his experience as well as the impact it had on his mental health, and the things he did to help be positive during that time.

Hi I’m Max, 25 years old, and I started my chemotherapy for Stage 3 Hodgkin Lymphoma in January this year. These last few months have been more challenging than I ever expected with infections after infections, extreme tiredness, inability to work, isolating as much as possible as well as a blood clot on my brain which very nearly killed me. But I got the all clear in June and my future now looks much more positive.

One of the worst times for me mentally was the period before the I heard the dreaded ‘C’ word and going for scans and a biopsy to determine my diagnosis. I had suffered from long covid since June 2020 and was told various times from GPs and doctors that it was just anxiety and that I was ‘too young to get cancer’. I was finally seen by the long covid clinic at St Georges Hospital in November 2021 and they ordered a CT scan straightaway, revealing the lumps in my chest. I remember being so confused since I was so grateful for them listening to me yet so surprised at the diagnosis as I had felt a lot better in the months prior.

I tried my best to keep a positive mentality throughout but this was extremely challenging at times. No more so when I suffered from a blood clot on the brain half way through my treatment. I was rushed for neurosurgery and had a drain placed on the brain to clear the clot for around 2 weeks. It was then when I suffered from delusions and severe mental health which was so scary. The doctors kept saying to me I was doing well medically but I really had to push to have help with my mental health. Eventually my oncology team gave me support which really helped when I was at my lowest. I left hospital after 5 weeks and resumed chemo 2 days after but I learnt to trust the doctors who clearly know how to treat us cancer patients.

A positive mental attitude also means allowing yourself to get overwhelmed and to cry at times to let it all out. I found that time itself was a very odd construct when going through chemotherapy, so I set myself daily and weekly goals with rewards along the way and planned events to look forward to. Although I had a great support network I did feel very lonely at times and watched the world go by day by day just staying in my bedroom which was a horrid feeling but I would try and see friends outside whenever I felt strong enough. Overall, I had 12 chemo sessions and I ticked every single one of these off on my calendar. This was placed font and center on my wall so I could see every day the progress I was making.

I have been incredibly fortunate to have had amazing support from my family and friends every step of the way. Especially my mother, sister and girlfriend who were literally my nurses 24/7, which I will never forget. My best friends also really shone through and I when I felt ready, I spoke to other patients on the ward and heard of their own stories making me feel part of a community that was so strong and relatable. The amazing nursing team at my oncology department were fantastic throughout. I don’t know how they do it, but I’ve always felt they were there for me, but I guess they are the experts and have seen it all before.

Something that surprised me was that it was often mentally harder for those closest around me, even if they do their very best not to show it. I thought it was all about me! I’d try to support them as much as possible, even if it was just a small thank you. My family, girlfriend and I all had access to mental health support services such as counselling which was such a comfort. This was so useful for me as I could just rant away to a professional who guided me through it all on my own terms. I also became an avid user some mindfulness apps such as ‘Calm’ and went through some basic meditation with a health practitioner which I never thought I’d do!

Support from Young Lives vs Cancer also helped throughout my treatment. The grant provided meant the stress of how my Mum would pay for the fuel to get back and forth to hospital was sorted and my social care team would also check in regularly, which helped to have someone to talk to.

I have learnt that #EveryWinMatters, no matter how small. I am so grateful to have beaten cancer and I hope to see more improvements made to the mental health support available to young people facing cancer to help with the loneliness and isolation a cancer diagnosis can bring.

Author: Emma

Posted on Thursday 6 October 2022

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