Social media and online accounts – your child’s digital legacy

Your child is bound to have a ‘digital legacy’ – in other words, the information they’ve left online, especially if they were a teenager or young adult. Think apps on their smartphone, social media profiles, blogs and gaming.

Choosing what to do with all this may not be something you feel you can do straight away. When the time comes, there are various steps to take and documentation to provide in order to close or manage online accounts.

If you don’t have the log in details, below is a list of things you might need to have to hand:

  • URL to your child’s timeline, profile or account
  • The username or handle of your child’s account
  • The email address associated with the account
  • Your child’s birth certificate or proof of your relationship
  • Their death certificate, or a link to an obituary or relevant news articles
  • Proof of authority that you are the lawful representative of your child, or his/her estate.

Remember, there can be a difference between an account that has been deactivated and one where all of the content and data is deleted completed, so don’t be afraid to query exactly what information will or won’t be stored.

Getting hold of your child’s data

Accessing everything on your child’s device or account (such as photos and videos) is much easier with login details. Your child may have given you access before they died but if not, getting their data can be tricky.

Most online platforms have a procedure for deactivating or deleting the account. You can also choose to memorialise some social media profiles. However, they will only give you data in exceptional circumstances – with a court order, for example.

If you can get hold of the organisation’s contact details, it’s worth asking what the procedure is.

Accessing smartphones and tablets

If your child had a smartphone or tablet, there will be apps and data on it like music and photographs. Smartphones and tablets will often require a passcode to access what’s stored on them. Apps can usually be uninstalled simply and quickly, if you have access, without needing to contact anyone by deleting them from the device.

If the smartphone or tablet is locked, and you don’t know the passcode, then there will be little you can do to get access to the content stored on it. The manufacturer may be able to help you unlock the device, but not without restoring it to factory settings which means deleting whatever data is stored on it.

Sometimes though, things like photos are automatically uploaded to a ‘cloud’ storage system when the phone or tablet is connected to wifi. If you have access to your child’s computer, you may be able to retrieve anything stored to the cloud, if they are logged in. Unfortunately, there are no simple answers because of data protection. If you’re confused, the best bet is to contact the manufacturer directly and see what they can do to help.

Social media accounts

A social networking site or app allows you to connect with friends, colleagues or other users. Users can share photos, videos, other users’ posts, articles and updates with their ‘audience’ – people who follow their account. For young people, social media can be an important way to communicate and many develop a strong digital identity.

You may well have a good idea of how important, or unimportant, social media was to your child. They might have talked about their followers or posted about their experience of cancer. If they were committed to sharing their story, you might want to consider posting an update to let people know the news, when you feel ready.

Some parents choose to keep their child’s channel active so they can continue posting about issues that were important to them. You could also change the account’s status to memorialised as a way or remembering them. This means that you can use your child’s account to celebrate their life – where friends and family can share memories and photos.

If you’d prefer to delete or deactivate the account, each social media platform has its own policy in place. Some will remain active unless you notify them and others will automatically shut down after a certain length of time.

The majority of companies will not pass on passwords or usernames because of data protection laws.  So unless you know your child’s login details, you will need to contact each company separately.

Facebook

If you memorialise your child’s Facebook, ‘Remembering’ will be shown next to your child’s name on their profile, their posts remain visible and you can choose to allow friends to share memories to the timeline. Only verified immediate family members or executor can request this, or the complete removal of an account along with all associated content.

Instagram

An app for sharing photos and videos publicly, or privately to approved followers. Memorialising the account will mean that posts and pictures that your child has posted will remain visible.

LinkedIn

A networking site focused on business and employment where members can create a free profile and connect with colleagues or potential recruiters.

Remove a LinkedIn account.

Pinterest

Pinterest will deactivate an account on your behalf as long as you provide certain information. To start the process you will need to email care@pinterest.com

Snapchat

There is currently no policy for deactivating accounts on someone’s behalf. Snapchat told us that the most simple way is to follow this link > select the ‘Yes’ button beside ‘Still need help?’ > Fill in the contact form and attach a copy of the death certificate.

If you can log in to their account you can delete it via the settings, or by logging in and following this link. It will first be deactivated for 30 days. While the account is deactivated, your child’s friends will not be able to contact or interact with your child on Snapchat. After 30 days, the account will be permanently deleted and at this stage, you can delete the app from your child’s phone.

Twitter

You can request for a profile to be deactivated. You will need to fill out some information for the request and more details once instructed.

Request the deactivation of a Twitter account.

YouTube

YouTube is part of Google. This means closing a Google account will also remove the YouTube account.

Close a YouTube account or request data.

Closing email accounts

Most email providers will say that they have a responsibility to honour the privacy of their users, even in the event of their death, so will not give out login details. However, some state that if there is a “compelling need” to access the account or if you have legal permission then you can request access or the release of content.

  • AOL Mail (American Online): Read their online guidance
  • Apple iCloud (Mac.com, Me.com): All content in an account will be deleted once it is deactivated. There isn’t a clear process so the first step is to contact Apple Support on 0844 209 0611 or 0800 107 6285. There is also an online support service where you can arrange for someone to give you a call.
  • Gmail (this will also close a YouTube account as both are Google platforms): Read their online guidance
  • Microsoft: Hotmail, Outlook, Live, Windows Live, MSN: To request the release of content and to close an account you will need to complete an online form
  • Yahoo! Mail: You’ll need your child’s email address and to contact Yahoo directly to get further instructions on closing the account.

Online bank accounts

Your child’s online bank account will usually be automatically closed along with their main account. You can find out more information about closing a bank or building account in dealing with finances.

Managing other online accounts

For accounts such as Amazon Prime, eBay, PayPal or Netflix, your best bet is to search for a direct contact on the website and ask how to close the account. This can be time-consuming and involve lengthy conversations so make sure you prioritise the ones that are most important – paid subscriptions for example – and take the time you need, as well as getting support if you can.

Some companies make it difficult to find their contact details so use social media to your advantage. It’s common practice to use Twitter and tweet a question. Make sure you include the company’s Twitter handle (their username beginning with @).

Direct debits will be stopped when your child’s bank account is closed but if there is any outstanding debt, it’s worth contacting the company directly and explaining the situation – they may be able to simply close the account and waive any fees.

Useful links

Digital Legacy Association

How to close online accounts and services when someone dies – Everplans

Digital legacy – Bereavement Advice Centre

How to contact different digital services – Bereavement Advice Centre

Digital legacies – Get Safe Online

You might also find this helpful

Grief and bereavement

Information and advice about grief and loss, for parents and carers whose child has died of cancer.

Taking care of important paperwork

How to let government departments and benefits services know.

Sorting practicalities when your child dies

Informing people, sorting paperwork, funeral costs and finances.